Easiest elevator speech ever for transitioning military

"I know I am supposed to give you an elevator speech," said Tom, a transitioning naval officer.  "But really, I don't know what that is."

Neither does anyone else.  The elevator speech--in which you are supposed to sell yourself to a potential employer at a networking event in the amount of time it takes to ride in an elevator--intimidates so many of the jobseekers I know.  They act like their value as a human being is going to be summed up in three paragraphs.

Not so much.